So... I flew to Florida on Wednesday, to visit with my Mom who was having major abdominal surgery. The flight was uneventful, if a little rough. I left Bangor at 45 deg, and clear skies, beautiful, sunny day. I arrived in Orlando (Sanford Airport) in the midst of major thunderstorms which have not yet stopped (36 hours later). So much for Sunny Florida... I picked up a rental, a Kia Rio, at Alamo, who knew ANYONE still made manual crank-up windows! In hindsight, I should have paid the extra $30.00/day for the Camaro... but whatever, I didn't come here to review cars...



This was my first trip here since Mom moved here permanently 6 yrs ago. Whenever we wanted to plan a vacation, it never worked out, whether financially, or with scheduling conflicts, it just never came together. Of course now, I feel guilty, never having found the time to make the trip down with the family, but I guess I can't dwell...

The important thing is, is that I WAS able to make it here, even if only for a few days. It has been nice being able to help, even a little, with the little things. I think, and, well, I hope, it has been comforting to Mom. Unfortunately I'm not able to stay, even until she goes home. I must fly home on Sunday, Mom will probably be able to go home on Monday. It is extremely difficult to be able to try to balance taking care of my family(ies). Lillian + the boys will be OK for a few days without me but I do feel like I'm abandoning them, at what has turned out to be a very tough time for Lillian. I fly home on Sunday, we leave for RI on Tuesday for her Auntie Marguerite's funeral services. I feel like I need to be here, and I feel like I need to be home. I will be home very soon, though, and will be able to take care of my beloved.

I've spent most all of my time here in the hospital, which is, well, it sucks being here seeing your loved one in so much pain. The staff here is fairly attentive, although the pain meds never seem to come quick enough. It's very difficult being on this side of the coin. I am a healthcare professional and hear patients complain when their meds are not ready. I've been known to think, “Well, lady, you are not the center of the universe, the world does NOT revolve around you, your just going to have to wait your turn”. Usually this, though is in response to somebody who is “simply too busy to be wasting time at the pharmacy”. I've always tried to expedite what I felt were the more important meds, those that needed antibiotics and/or pain meds. Those that have just come from the dentist, or just been discharged from an ambulatory surgery. Notice I say I've always tried... doesn't mean I've always succeeded, to get those most urgent meds out in time. I know in the past 18 yrs., I've probably reacted with apathy, or worse, callously to somebody in need of the medication I was to dispense. Being on this side of it, watching Mom struggle with crippling pain, and, after abdominal surgery, being very nauseated, (we don't want her throwing up after having her abdomen cut open), I must say, that yes, the patient DOES INDEED feel that the world revolves around them. And get the fucking morphine NOW!!! It has caused me reflection on how I practice, and how I will continue to practice. Even though I am not the patient, I am here with her, watching her in need of the medications, and dammit, they just can't come quick enough when the pain comes back. It has been a humbling experience. It has been an eye-opening time and my patients will benefit from it.

A longtime family friend is coming in on Saturday to help care for Mom after she goes home. This news led to a great sense of relief, knowing that she was going to have a live-in “nurse”. No, she's not a nurse, but she is a very caring, kind person (I'll never forget you, for being with me after I got hit by a car... pure coincidence, or divine intervention... who knows...) who I know will help nurse Mom back to health. Both my brother + I were very happy to learn she was going to be here, and be here for 3 weeks, to help. This is what you could only consider a true friend. This woman is leaving her home in New Hampshire, to come stay here in Florida for 3 weeks. This is not what one would consider a vacation for her. She has come all this way to offer her help, to nurse her friend back to health. I am so thankful for her, it's hard to put into words. Mom also has several brothers + sisters, that all live very close by, and I know that she will be well looked after. Perhaps that is why I hadn't been down here yet. Knowing she has a good support group of friends and family had given me a sense of comfort. A sense of comfort that has grown, especially after seeing the outpouring of support and help being offered during my too-short stay.

Thank you to all my aunts + uncles, and all of Mom's friends, and especially thank you Tudy, for giving up so much to be here to care for Mom.

As always I welcome any questions or comments.

Carl Genius